CalExotics Hype Massager – Sex Toy Review
When I was looking through SheVibe’s catalog of toys, trying to decide on what I wanted to review next, two things really drew me to the CalExotics Hype Massager…
1.) It is a vibrating wand. I am all about vibrating wands. If I could only use one kind of sex toy for the rest of my life, it would be a vibrating wand. VIBRATING WANDS FOR LIFE!
2.) The design. You can’t tell me that it isn’t eye catching. It’s like my vibrator went and got itself into a fight with a graffiti artist, and the graffiti artist won. I am super into this design… I also like that its just black and white… its like… classy… but also a little bit punk rock. GIMMIE THOSE PUNK ROCK VIBES!
I don’t have a wildly large collection of CalExotics toys (although I did have a super nice chat with the CalExotics rep at AVN this year) or a whole lot of experience with them… I think the only Calexotics products I currently own (besides this wand) are the four Mini Marvels (which are super cute and super fun). So, I don’t have a lot of accumulative information on how CalExotics products work… like… I’ve used so many Satisfyer toys that I can pretty much guess how much (or little) I’m going to like their latest model based on what I know of their previous toys… but that isn’t so for the CalExotics Hype Massager… it’s all still a mystery to me… so I was actually really excited to give this toy a go! I was super-duper hopeful that this would turn out to be a great wand and I’d have another wand I could recommend (bonus points for it being reasonably affordable) when people asked for something but didn’t want a Doxy/Hitachi (my go to suggestions when it comes to wands).
I’ll just cut to the chase here, I liked the Hype Massager. I really did. After my first use I was on the fence about it, because it has a few quirks that I’m not super in to… but it finished strong… by the end of my testing period… I was a fan of the CalExotics Hype Massager.
So there are two things I didn’t really care for, and one thing that I wish was better… but none of these things were big deal breakers for me. My first issue is the hyper flexible neck. Now… this is a feature that a lot of people like, so I’m really not going to knock them for this… especially since the toy is advertised as having a flexible neck… so… obviously I should have known this before bringing the vibrating wand home. But I don’t particularly like toys with super flexible necks, because when I masturbate, I like to put a lot of pressure down on my clit… so when a toy has a neck that is TOO flexible, it feels like the head of the toy is just leaning away from me the harder I push… so I ended up having to place my thumb against the head of the toy to squish it down into my clit. So, if you are a person who likes a lot of pressure (like me), just be aware that the Hype has a very flexible neck. But if you like toys with such flexibility… you’re going to like this wand.
My second issue… is kind of dumb. So, when I masturbate, I usually like to take my glasses off… you know… for safety… I don’t need to break them (because I have really shitty health insurance that only pays for a pair of glasses once every two years)… but with my glasses off… I could not for the life of me find the damn control buttons! They really blend in to black and white graffiti theme and become nearly invisible (which is great for aesthetics but terrible for functionality)! Also, normally I can find a toys buttons just by feel…but the Hype features what I would describe as a raised quilted texture (which I admit, my fingers do find quite pleasing) over most of the handle… which makes feeling for the buttons a little difficult. This is really a silly issue and again, I’m not really going to knock the toy for it… but its just another thing worth being aware of… especially if you are as blind as I am without your glasses, you will have to hold the wand inches from your nose to locate the buttons every time you want to change settings. Luckily there are only two buttons… so at least once you find them, it is very simple to operate.
The power button is the button that is located closest to the head of the toy, press and hold this button for three seconds to turn the toy on or off. The button below that, the one with the wavy lines, controls the 10 vibrations modes. The Hype has four intensities and six pattern modes. The patterns were pretty standard, nothing that really wowed me (I’m rarely a fan of patterns, I stick to the steady vibrations). To cycle through the 10 modes you just keep clicking the wavy line button… which makes it simple to use… but always a little frustrating that you have to cycle through EVERYTHING to get back to a previous pattern… but at least you aren’t cycling through 20 different settings… (I own toys like this… it makes me so angry when I need to change settings…).
And the one thing I wish was just a little bit better with the CalExotics Hype Massager is power. Again, this isn’t something I’m knocking the wand for… because this is just another personal preference I have… I like a wand with a lot of power… I want to feel my toes vibrate right off my body… I want a jet engine to look on with jealously and say “DAMN… that’s a lot of power”… I like to be vibrated into a puddle of goo that takes hours to reform back into a human. The Hype doesn’t have that kind of power… the Hype is what I consider to be more mid-range (bordering on high)… it is still plenty powerful and will probably be satisfying for most. One thing these vibrations have going for them though is they have some deep rumbles, I was suitably impressed by the rumble this little wand produced. Sadly, it just isn’t strong enough for someone as snobby as I am. BUT I still had a great orgasm (or several). The Hype wand got the job done. I have no complaints other than I wanted to orgasm faster! I want a vibrator so strong I’m orgasming before the toy even touches my clit! I am also aware of how unreasonable I am… which is why I’m going to say… the CalExotics Hype Massager is probably strong enough for most folks. The rumbly vibrations are really pretty excellent, they did penetrate nice and deep (especially when I held the head down against my clit with my thumb… stupid flexible neck).
The Hype Massager is rechargeable and comes with a USB charging cable. Stick the single pronged end into the very bottom of the wand and plug the other end into your computer or wall adapter and you are good to go! It takes roughly two hours to achieve a full charge of the wand and you will get about 70 minutes worth of play time out of the toy if you run it solely on its highest speed (which I do)… you can eke out about 2 hours of play time if you are happy with the lower (but still super rumbly) speeds.
The toy is covered in a smooth, matte, silicone. Which makes the toy easy to clean. It is also safe to use the Hype wand in water, so take it in the tub or shower with you… or to a sexy pool party… or go masturbate in a rainstorm… whatever aquatic activity you are in to… you can masturbate with the Hype!
Overall, I am pretty happy with the time I spent with the CalExotics Hype Massager, it really is a nice vibrating wand! The price isn’t all that bad either, at the time of this review you can pick up the Hype for under $50 (which is totally doable on my normally tiny budget). The vibrations aren’t overly powerful (but I imagine are powerful enough for most tastes… because as I said… I’m satisfied by nothing less than a turbo speed engine) and are deep and full of satisfying rumble. The material is excellent (I had someone DM me about someone telling them that the colors chip off… but I’ve owned this for months now and have not experienced this at all), the silicone is soft and matte and perfectly touchable (and easy to clean). If you are looking for a rumbly wand but don’t want/need the powerhouse that the Doxy or Hitachi is… the CalExotics Hype Massager is probably a good bet! I can totes recommend!
Ready to bring the CalExotics Hype Massager home?! Pick one up at SheVibe! Do you like the look of the Hype Wand but don’t really want/need a vibrating wand? No problem… check out the rest of the CalExotics Hype Collection!
The CalExotics Hype Massager was provided to my free of charge by SheVibe in exchange for my honest review.